The Misadventures of Shleck
More to come.............
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William Griff was a very unfortunate child, shortly after his birth his parents were devoured by something and he was left an orphan with his neglectful uncle. His uncle was an alcoholic, a frequent drinker of Preacher’s Choice whiskey, and spent his days in his Outzone apartment getting drunk while William cried himself to sleep. However, fate, karma or just plain “shit happens” cosmic forces would change things for baby William. His uncle’s crummy apartment was raided by mutants. After William’s uncle was gutted and skinned, the mutants soon set their eyes on poor little William. Two mutants saw this neglected baby and decided that instead of eating him they would adopt him as their own. He was stripped of his birth name and named Shleck by his new parents.
William was not a mutant and it would be some time till he knew his past…
“Happy Birthday Shleck!” yelled Shleck’s mutant parents, Gromm and Teka, as they presented him with a roasted rat which had been pierced with 16 candles.
Shleck blew out the candles, the rat was then placed on the dining room table (not that shacks really have dining room tables) and the rest of the family sat down to eat. Shleck smiled at his portion of rat and was thankful for what he had. Though he mind was still plagued by something.
“So, did ya ask that Krela girl out?” asked Gromm glaring over the table at Shleck.
“No. She just laughed at me and called me a flesh bag.”
“Aaaawww never mind son.”
“Dad why was I born so deformed?” said Shleck sulkily.
Shleck’s “parents” stopped eating. Grandpa Yolin, who was a brain floating in a jar surrounded by fluid and wires, huffed at this remark. Gromm looked at Yolin with a cruel stare from his one good eye.
“Well, sometimes life deals you a bad hand. Sometimes a person gets born with perfect straight teeth and tight fitting skin. But that doesn’t make you a freak. It just means that your…special…and me and your mother love you very much.”
“Yes we do”, piped up Teka.
“At least celebrate the boy’s sixteenth with something a little fancier than roasted rat. It’s all you ever eat!” yelled Yolin.
“How dare you! I work my fingers to the bone and what do I have to show for it…BONEY FINGERS! It’s not easy cooking a rate when one of your arms has been replaced by a gatlin canon. So shut up before I remove ya vocal plugs,” said Gromm very sternly.
“Oh don’t you yell at me…I’ll kick your scabby behind!”
“What are you talking about? You’re legless.” retorted Teka.
“Nonsense! I haven’t touched a drop!”
“No, I mean you don’t have any legs. Don’t have a body either.”
“Quiet woman and just pass me some roasted rat.”
Gromm and Teka ignored Grandpa Yolin and went back to eating. When Shleck’s parents weren’t looking he sneakily placed a bit of rate meat in Yolin’s brain jar and winked at him.
Shleck had spent his entire life in the Outzone. In that time he had not made a single friend. All the other mutated kids made fun of him and wouldn’t let him play in their games of kick the human head and flesh slap ( basically the age old game of tag but you hit a person with a piece of skinned flesh from some unlucky traveller who passed through the Outzone). All the other kids had hair falling out, wretched teeth and gunky eyeballs. Shleck however, had straight teeth, blonde hair, beautiful blue eyes, clear skin and genitals that worked.
Shleck sometimes felt he didn’t belong. Luckily he had his family on standby to give him cuddles and comfort. Although, Grandpa Yolin did seem to be holding back something, like he wanted to tell Shleck something and as Shleck grew up became increasingly eager to tell him something. Whether or not Yolin would tell him something or just call him an idiot like he usually does remained a mystery to Shleck.
