Nerd 1 - The Archive

R minus 4 days...

NDA were setting up a training ground in the Northern Wastes. They had decided to use Soliko Lab as this ground. The area was to be set up for weapon testing stations and wargame exercises, to train their numbers. Centuri stood on a rock, looking out across his team as they worked. He looked towards the north and saw dustclouds raising from around Dome of York.
"That can't be good. What are they doing now?"
"Rumour has it they've been digging out trenches around the gate." Omega Res came up by his side.
"Trenches?"
"Yeah, seems they've been fortifying their position with more than just those rolling bots."
"Have a few more turrets placed around the outpost. Just in case..."

Cargo transports had made their deliveries during the night to the Uplinks. The cargo had been unloaded and the receiving clans had taken the contents down into the underground sections, where they began to install them. Today the transports could be seen pulling up to the cities loading docks, and the crews heading in for some long overdue rest. Meanwhile, Reza was ordering the satellite dishes to full activation. Ms. Edwards continued to relay the orders, but still could not determine the purpose.

Early in the morning, Ithaqua had decided to lead most of NUTS on a hunt between Neocron and Tech Haven, clearing out mutants and creatures as and when they found them. McDanish and Warlock had reported they would not be joining them, as they were still investigating the hole in the wall they had discovered. But the rest of NUTS had decided to go on a one week hunt with Ithaqua. They would salvage what supplies they could in the field, and sleep under the stars. Hopefully, they would have fun. Vain and SoulBurner took point, for none knew how to find creatures better than they. Evangelion and Gully Foyle followed up, discussing the pro's and con's of breast implants. Lisa Davitt, Techi, Trillian, Ithaqua, Mako Tanaka and the rest brought up the centre. Byron and Diesel served as the rear guard. They marched from Outzone station to Jerriko and went to the ASG. They activated some of their vehicles and loaded up. Ithaqua took the drivers seat of his 'bus' and others loaded in. ReefSmoker, Vain and Tiny Shopkeeper activated their Mechs and began marching alongside. Foyle decided his recently acquired Reveler would be a nice ride, so he drove in that. And thus they set off before noon, with no clear intention other than to kill some mobs.

Tomorrow was to be a very special day for SpikeZ and Danae. It was to be the third anniversary of their first encounter with each other. To celebrate, SpikeZ had planned a special trip for the two of them. They would set out late in the afternoon from their Plaza 4 quarters, and take a leisurely evening stroll. Their destination was to Outzone 7, where they had first ran into each other. Now, normally one would not even consider going to OZ 7 during the night, much less intending to spend the night there, but of late, the mutant population in that area had been reduced to nothing. Not really caring either way, as he felt certain he could protect his puffy cheeked goddess, SpikeZ carried on with his plan. He met up with Danae for a quick lunch of sushi (not the special kind) and then they grabbed their backpacks and started their walk. The two walked, for the most part without talking, not really feeling the need to, through Pepper park. A small clan skirmish broke out about them, but the two were oblivious...

Yesterday's discovery of the caved in wall had ruined Wannabe's perfect mood. He now saw days of excavation work before him before he could even begin on the cable inspections.
"L dude, come on, get that pile of rubble there out of here." Wannabe yelled as he continued to shovel loose rubble away.
"I'm a welder, Jim, not a dumptruck!"
"What?"
"Never mind, can't we get some help for this?"
"Not a chance. The rest of NEXT is tied up in some 'special assignment'. NUTS are off on a walk today, so there's no one I can call."
"What special assignment?"
"I'm not sure. But most of the NEXT runners have been working down in the labs, so they must be manufacturing something down there."
"Cool. Maybe its more hovercabs for the new tracks."
"Seems likely. Anyway, lets get back to clearing this crap out." He took another shovel-load, "Hey LVirus, check this out." and he lifted up a mechanical arm.
"Wonder what that came off?"
"Might be off an old maintenance bot, before they figured out this stuff needs the human touch."
"I suppose..."

Cassandra had the afternoon off, so she was relaxing at home. She'd sent a few private mails in the early noon, but was basically taking the rest of the day to just lounge about the house in her underwear. Reza seemed fairly content with himself. Whatever inane game he was playing with the Outposts was keeping him happy, and this celebration he had planned was obviously something he was planning on enjoying himself. So, Cassandra could just take it easy. And considering how the last few months had been going, she needed it. Her first real break wasn't for another 2 days, but she couldn't wait. Her private messager bleeped, but she decided to hold off for an hour before answering it.

"Ewww, what did I just step in? Is that moving?" McDanish exclaimed.
"Would you keep your mind on what you're doing?"
"My mind is on the path, and the path is covered in slimy moving things."
"Well mind the slimy moving things and cover the path. Shine your flashlight over there, I need more light." Warlock was investigating a rusty door at the end of the corridor. Yesterday the two had spent over half the day exploring the passage. In one direction it led to a small ante-room with various old tools. They were incredibly antiquated, which just led them to believe that they truly had found a long lost segment of the city. In one cabinet they had found a pneumatic drill, a relic of a bygone era, now replaced with the subwave drill or the mining tool. They had also found a generator, powered by combusting poisonglands in a flame. Crude, but effective. So they had converted the small room into the base for their investigations. They had brought adequate supplies in with them and then covered the hole in the wall over, to limit the chances of other runners invading their discovery. The air was stale in the corridors, but the ante=room itself had ventilation access to the city, so was quite hospitable to life. After spending the night regaining their strength they had carried on to the other end. And now they had found the rusty door. There was no terminal for handprint access (or hacking, which was doubly annoying) so they were having to remove it completely. After 7 hours of attempting to weaken the hinges, McDanish was getting fed up.
"This thing ain't budging. Lets head back and find Wannabe, maybe we can borrow a Fusion-cutter."
"If we borrow a cutter, he'll have to account for it. That'll lead to people discovering what we're doing. And you know CityAdmin. Once they hear of any 'new discovery' they try to claim it for themselves."
"Okay fine, but how are we going to open this thing up?" Warlock reached to his belt and grabbed the last momento from his predecessor Master Yoda. The lasersword blazed to life and he disintegrated the hinges and the lock.
"Ok, so why didn't you do that before?"
"Take 3 steps back and ask me that." McDanish did just before the door teetered over and fell on where he had been sitting. The corridor echoed with the boom.
"Not exactly subtle was it?" Warlock grinned. McDanish grabbed his flashlight and the two entered the newly opened room. It was a pump station, apparently feeding drainwater from atop the city walls down into the filtration system of the city.
"We have found a pump station." McDanish said.
"Thanks for that. Now to save yourself a kidney punch, tell me why its sealed off."
"Umm..." he got punched in the kidney.
"I think this is part of the original city infrastructure."
"Huh?"
"When the city was built, the original focus was not on nice streets, lots of shops and special services. The focus was on maintaining the walls and the shields, keeping power running and making the basic functions of the city work. This must be part of the system that keeps the wall from decaying."
"Great, so if its that important, why is it abandoned."
"I don't know. Perhaps when they started window-dressing the city to make it look prettier, they walled this up and forgot about it."
"Maybe. So what now?"
"Well there's another door over there, lets try our exploring luck." The two walked over to the door and to their relief found that it had a simple drawbolt lock on it. They opened it with only a minor degree of effort and proceeded further within.

Reza received reports from his special agents during the times he gave Cassandra the afternoon off. He trusted her with the running of the entire city, and kept a fairly loose leash on her, but there were some things he would not share with anyone.
"So, what is the word on the Uplinks?"
"The preliminary signal bounce has been returned by all but 1 of the Uplinks. Tescom didn't get the shipment till early this morning, so they'll still be installing them. We detect no delays whatsoever and should be operational by 0200 hours tomorrow morning."
"Excellent. Keep up the tests. I want it to work flawlessly."
"Yes sir." the transmission changed over to another of Reza's personal agents.
"What news from my breeding pens?"
"X-borg production has been limited like you ask. We have 3 deployable units ready for use at your call, and we can produce 3 more as quickly as 48 hours after getting the go ahead sir."
"Excellent. Ensure their containment. The proposed delivery system is ready?"
"Yes sir."
"Then all is in order. Good work and good day." and the next transmission came across."
"This is Tangent Requisitions, special agent, deep cover. The shipment of weapons has been prepared. It seems that NEXT will receive them tomorrow afternoon. However, there has been some snooping by the Fallen Angels. I will continue to monitor the weaponry till it has reached its destination. Out."
Yes, all was in place. The cover-story that NEXT would be expanding the subway was working well. Everyone believed that NEXT was about to begin a contract to build more hovercabs and increase Subway usage. This was far from the truth, but it covered enough bases to be believable. It explained the added manpower NEXT was using, the resources they were consuming and the continuiung conversations with CityAdmin over the matter. It would not explain the shipment of weapons tomorrow, but by then it would be too late to do anything. Reza sent out instructions, that Cassandra would issue in the morning to prepare a PR smokescreen, stating that CityAdmin had ordered a large number of Mechs for city protection, thus requiring a large scale order of weapons. The smoke only needed to buy them a few days. Then the project would be complete. Once ready, with the uplinks and the X-borgs, Reza would finally be able to....

The small opening in the steel door opened, and a tray of what passed as food was put through it. Tired and still in a lot of pain, Sid decided he'd make a move to get it shortly, but not yet. No one had come to see him for 5 days now. The last visit had been short and uneventful, with a doctor checking that the medikits were starting to take effect. He wondered how long he would be here, and what was to become of him. Then he tried to move for his food, and decided that thinking was a bad idea, almost as bad as moving. Darkness entered his cell as night fell on the wastelands.

R minus 3 days...

Danae and SpikeZ had camped out under the stars that night. Engrossed in each others company, the grottiness of the place around them had not phased their anniversary in the slightest. SpikeZ, attempting to be the perfect man, had attempted to make breakfast. Once they put the fire out, Danae made breakfast. The two decided to walk around the zone after their meal, and reminisce about the place they had met. That day long ago, when SpikeZ had been trying to reason with a Mutated Bat that his hair would not make good nesting material, and the Bat had responded by trying to render him bald. Danae had then burst in with her Double sharpened Claw and saved SpikeZ righteous hairstyle, and the two had got to know each other over a meal of Spicy Batwings.
As they walked, they spoke softly and intimately, occasionally stopping to mack out a bit, then carrying on when they realised some mutant creature was watching and enjoying. However, at one stop, Danae peered over SpikeZ' shoulder and spotted an open hatch. Curious, the two decided to take a look inside. They found a large corridor heading in a downward slope. Not wanting to go unprepared, the two returned for their gear before carrying on. With no idea as to when their journey would end or where they would end up, they entered the corridor together.

In another dark corridor...
The third day in the abandoned sections of the city, McDanish and Warlock were making good headway in their explorations. So far they had located 2 pump rooms that were functioning, and one that was not. Signs of wall degredation were appearing in that area, and they made a note to bring this to the attention of the people in charge. But just before dusk (or at least their timers told them that, no natural light had found them since they entered these tunnels) they discovered a very heavy deutrithium door. There was no way Warlock's laserblade would even singe this door, so instead they set to work in repairing the doors systems so they could open it. This was going to take some time.

In yet another dark corridor...
Wannabe had managed to requisition a hovertrolley to help them cart the debris out. As they had proceeded, they had noted more and more mechanised bits. He was starting to become concerned. Yet something nagged at his mind, something he knew he should know about his current situation, but it escaped him.

Night fell on the wastelands.

R minus 2 days...

Soliko was armed solid. Scouting parties had detected numerous Dome of York bots rolling around in ever increasing circles from the gates. The rumours of the trenches were true, and now the entire surrounding areas were littered with pop-up turret defenses. Beta Warbots were out in force and whatever was causing the dustclouds had yet to show itself. Centuri had not slept a wink since he'd heard the rumbling growl of 3 beta Warbots walking past the base of Soliko precipice 2 nights earlier. Since then he had called in all NDA forces; placed Mechs at strategic locations and the outpost was now bristling with turrets. But still he was ill at ease. It was in the air again, that sense that something was coming. The last time he'd felt like this, Neocron had been given a gaping gash in the city wall, most of the wastelands had been destroyed, and Centuri himself had ended up with a piece of outpost stuck in his thigh for 3 weeks. And the winds were picking up...

Ithaqua's hunting party had finished an outstanding battle in the Crystal Caves. Carrying bits of batqueen with them, NUTS were feeling quite good. They loaded back into their transports, and this time set off west. Ithaqua was really happy he'd thought to start this hunting party.

"Simon, have the calibrators been adjusted yet?" Ulam asked.
"Yes sir, the man from CityAdmin was just here. He's completed his work on the system."
"You made sure this time?"
"He had work papers issued by Ms. Edwards herself."
"Ok, thank you Simon." Uman went back to his work. In the alley behind his office, an individual in CityAdmin clothing and holding official papers, threw them on top of the corpse in the trashcan and walked off towards Pepper Park.

"I have had it with this crap, man. This was supposed to be a 2 day job. And yet, here I am, 4 days in, still digging through this crap. If I find the moron who caused this cave-in, he is gonna suffer dearly." LVirus was wishing he'd never become gainfully employed.
"I think I might be that moron." Wannabe said softly. LVirus turned to look at him. In his hands were what was left of an exploded fusion-cutter. "I threw this down here to block the corridor when Dome of York tried to invade."
"But that was months ago right?"
"Yeah, so?"
"Well look at this, this damage is new. It can't have been here for more than a few weeks." Wannabe realised he was correct.
"Lets keep digging for a bit shall we?"

Around noon the announcement came over the loudspeakers of the city:
"Citizens of Neocron. This is Lioon Reza. Recently CityAdmin has undertaken the task of studying the Ceres Disc's further. In our investigations, we discovered a reference to a particular date, every year, that we have overlooked. That date is the 4th of July. It was traditional for a long since dead country, the United States, to celebrate their Independence on this day. Since the attack by Dome of York several months ago, we have not celebrated the fact that our city is not an occupied city. So, the day after next, we shall celebrate the 4th of July. Shipments from the Uplinks have been acquired by CityAdmin clans of food and beverages for our enjoyment. I encourage all citizens, even the denizens of Tsunami and Black Dragons, to join us in this celebration. As was customary, ProtoPharma and Tangent have developed fireworks, for a visual display in the nights sky. Thank you for your time."

That afternoon MAX-T and Synergy XR received delivery of the weapons consignment from Tangent. They transported the goods to the factory beneath NEXT HQ and got to work on the installation of the weapons.

The corridor that Danae and SpikeZ had entered had proven to be insanely long. Eventually the two found a relatively level place and went to sleep, and then resumed their walk the next morning.
"Are we there yet?" Danae asked.
"No."
"Are we there yet?"
"No."
"Are we there yet?"
"Hun..."
"Sorry. Ooh, whats this? Sugarfree Milky Ren?" Danae tasted it, and seemingly liked it.
"No self-respecting man would eat a sugarfree Milky Ren."
"Well I'm fortunately not a man then." SpikeZ agreed, for so many reasons. Eventually their journey levelled off, but still no end was in sight. But determined to see things through, they walked on.

The replaced cables conducted power from the gland powered engine in their sleeping quarters. The doors jolted to life, then creaked out of the way. Victorious, McDanish and Warlock stepped into the next room. And they stopped and stared in awe.

Before them was a monolithic machine, some 10 stories tall, cables running to and fro. From where they were standing, they could see 4 other structures, each identical, partitioned from each other and enclosed by a duraglass ceiling. The balcony they stood on overlooked the 5 structures.
"Ok, so what are those?"
"Reactors." McDanish replied.
"Huh?"
"These must be the 5 reactors that power the city."
"Ohhh... k, so I'm guessing we shouldn't be here."
"By all accounts no one will be."
"Oro?" Warlock's affinity for the anime sections of the Ceres Discs' kicked in again.
"The cities generators were placed before the ground levels of the city were. They were given self repairing and self replicating maintenane drones with the sole purpose of maintaining the reactors. Then they were sealed off according to the tales."
"You mean those busted down drones over there?" And they both looked to see where he was talking. A landing bay for the drones which was obviously their launching station, had been crushed by a girder that had fallen down. They looked around and could see no working drones.
"Dude this is serious," Warlock grabbed McD by the arm, "we need to check the reactors. If nothings maintaining them, there could be trouble."
"Indeed, lets go."

A few hours later the two had determined that the reactors were working fine, but there were no drones in operation at all.
"So what do we do?"
"Well, there's no immediate danger, so lets see if we can't fix some of these drones. If they're self repairing, they might have instructions on how to fix their landing platform as well."
"Ok, lets try. But if we haven't figured this out by sundown tomorrow we go up and tell someone."
"Absolutely."
And so they began their work. McDanish began opening one of the lesser damaged ones, looking for areas that needed repairing or replacing. Warlock began scrounging for drone carcasses that they could canibalise to fix the others.

Cassandra Edwards excused herself from Reza's office slightly early this evening, saying she had an old friend coming to visit. She returned home and accepted her visitor just before 9. The two spoke for a few hours, then her visitor passed her a package, a modified hacktool with extended range. Her visitor then departed.
"We're almost there. Just a little further."

R minus 1 day...

Centuri was glad he was not sleeping. By morning light, the canyon was infested. Communication signals were jammed and they were in trouble. Scythe-bots were pouring across the cliffs, Beta Warbots were marching on their position, those annoying artillery cannons were slowly rolling their way, and Ceres War Veterans were standing on the clifftops like something out of Shaka Zulu. Not a shot had been fired, but they were here, and Centuri was not going to lose this time.

Ithaqua and the others had reached Regants Fortress. They decided to take a day off from hunting and set up camp in the field south west of the generep. It was a nice flat space with little creature population. Hurricane, not being one to just sit around, decided to start wandering further west, using his cloaking device rather than his gun when trouble arose. The rest set up camp, watched Eva do her morning lapdance for whoever was closest, and peeping on Lisa and Trillian as they got undressed in their tents. Ithaqua just kicked back and enjoyed the moment.

Wannabe was not enjoying a single moment. The more he dug, the more he realised this landslide had been orchestrated. At 2 in the afternoon he discovered the broken tip off a CityAdmin subwave drill. At 4:30pm LVirus found the coattails off a Monks jacket. And as the workshift came to a close, neither was leaving. There was something not far off and they were going to find it.

Danae had found it. The door at the end of the corridor. Not caring what was on the other side, just wanting to end their 3 day trek, she opened it leaving SpikeZ to haul in their luggage. When he arrived his eyes met with the following sight:
Chemicals lined one wall, and workbenches the other. There was no one present aside from the two of them, but it was evident that people had been here, and recently. They investigated the workbench. It was obvious they had been mixing the chemicals here, but for what purpose? Danae was about to move on when SpikeZ spotted a small package behind part of the bench. He reached for it and brought it to sight. It was an explosive. A chemical composite bomb to be exact. Suddenly the realisation that the two had walked into something much bigger than they ever intended smacked them round the ears, and they knew they were in trouble. They were deliberating their next move when a door at the other end of the room opened. A Psi-monk, with face covered, entered and stopped short.
"Who...who are you!!!" the monk said.
"Hey, I know that voice... its ... um.... oh come on help me out..." SpikeZ started trying to 'guess that voice', but the Monk wasn't waiting. It dived out of the room, and the door slammed shut and locked. But not before an active bomb rolled in. SpikeZ went to pick it up but Danae grabbed him and hauled him out the rear door, which from this side was obviously a hidden exit. They dived out into the corridor just as the bomb went off and the two dived to the ground.
"SpikeZ sweetie, you have really got to learn to sense danger better."
"Danger? But that monk left that for us."
"Yes, to KILL us."
"Oh come on, he just met us." Danae rolled her eyes. SpikeZ had this ridiculous love for all people and never believed they could be bad. One day she would knock that realisation into him. But now was not the time. Danae knew who that was, and with the knowledge that that monk was armed with composite explosives, she knew there would be trouble. It had taken 2 days downslope to walk to the room. They would need to make haste to get back in time to warn anyone.

Reza was taking much of the day to just bask in the peoples joy. The declarations of the 4th of July celebrations for tomorrow had greatly picked up city morale. And the message from NEXT indicating that his pet project was completed was picking up his morale. And the silk teddie that Cassandra was wearing was picking up the Little Dictators morale. Life was good.

Life sucked. Standing there in that silk teddie, about to give herself over to Reza's Little Dictator (and yes she did mean little) was one of the degrading parts of her job that she had accepted for all these years. But her break started tomorrow, why couldn't she just go home? She closed her eyes as Reza approached and the lights went out.

The lights came on.
"Hey I found a lightswitch!" McDanish yelled.
"Thanks man, that helps a lot." Warlock had grown tired of scrounging for drones, only to find them by tripping over them. The light showed two more just a few steps to his right, so he walked over to them. Then he stooped to pick them up and stopped dead in his tracks. McDanish was called over.
"What's up?"
"Look." McDanish looked, and he saw. The drones had the scorch marks that only Copbot Rifles leave.
"What the hell happened down here."
"It might not be a good idea to report this." McDanish stated.
"For once, thats an obvious statement that I wanted to hear." Warlock grabbed the drones, and they got back to work on the repairs.

Sid was abruptly hauled from his cell and dragged onto a balcony overlooking the gate to the city. His eyes, while blurry, still widened at the sight. The sight of the military power before him was overwhelming.
"You know, Reza assumed that he had crushed the majority of our forces during the last campaign. And he'd be right," Garn Warner, Military Commander of Dome of York was speaking, "but the majority was not all. I still possess an army greater than any Neocron can put together. And come noon tomorrow, I shall unleash them." Sid could only look on stunned. Finally words formed.
"Why am I here?"
"You were requested." Sid looked at him strangely.
"Requested?"
"Yes. You shall see. Take him to his new quarters." Sid was taken to an actual apartment. It was comfortable, though messy, and a fair improvement over his cell. He went back to sleep, to await the dawn.

Darkness fell on the wastelands.

R...

Reza, under the escort of several STORM bots, exited his apartment and walked the streets. Runners were in such a buzz over the days festivities, they seemed to have forgiven him everything they'd normally have thrown boulders at him for. Food and drink was plentiful, and Pepper park had an abundance of sushi, special and otherwise.

MoonUnit, sensing sushi, decided now would be a good time to visit the lower plain. The other EGOS felt they might as well come along. But something was wrong. MoonUnit started to look concerned, as one after the other, they all tried to warp to the Lower Plain. And failed.

"It is done, my Master," Teh Bunneh spoke, "the Lower plain cannot be accessed by the EGOS or The DEVS. They are alone." and the grin began to grow.

Hurricane had allowed his impetuousness to get the better of him. He was now stuck on the roof of a wood hut, alongside the swamp road leading west from Regant's Fortress, surrounded by aggressors and Swamp Stranglers. He sent a call to his clanmates to come give him a hand, but they were still going to be a good 2 hours away. So he huddled down on the roof to wait, occasionally taking potshots at anything that got too close.

Centuri and NDA stood tense. Since an hour earlier, the forces of Dome had stopped moving. They just stood poised to move.
"Why are they here? Do they want us so bad?" Omega Res asked.
"No, last time they passed by Tech Haven because they had a secret plan to knock out their turrets. This time I'm guessing that won't work, so they're coming down this way, past us and then past Twilight Guardians." Centuri responded.
"And TG will just..."
"let them walk right past, yeah. Make sure everyone's got lots of ammo. They're gonna need it."

"I don't think I can fix these little guys by myself." McDanish stated.
"Yeah, I'm having no luck here either." They both dropped their tools and sat down in silence.
"Maybe we can sneak one or two out, and get the others to help. Then we can return here with them."
"Suppose thats an idea. Lets take a breather then head on out." Warlock replied. Again they sat in silence. Warlock suddenly thought he heard something new. A whining sound, like something powering up, and then a regular bleep.
"What's that?"
"Dunno." McDanish replied. They both got up to look. Suddenly, Warlock came upon the source.
"Oh.... hell. This is all starting to make the kind of sense that sucks."
"What?" McDanish ran over, only to wish he hadn't, "is that a bomb?" the bleeping device was connected to a very large container of composite explosives.
"Yep. Now we know why the drones were purposely shot down. This is a sabotage operation."
"But why? Why would Copbots be part of a mission to sabotage the reactors that power the city."
"If the city had been betrayed." Warlock grumbled.
"Well can we disarm it?"
"We got about 2 hours. Even if we went for help from people who knew how, and we're still not sure who's behind this, we can't make it back again in 2 hours."
"So fine, lets get outta here before we get fragged."
"Dude, this bomb is here for a reason. To put the whole city up Sh*t creek. If we can't find a way to at least limit its effects, then running outta here won't help. Besides, remember the walls surrounding the reactors?"
"Yeah, the deutrithium barriers."
"Well no explosion could get through those, so we only have to get outside the reactor containers. So we can save ourselves. But how do we save the reactors?"
"Well, look. There's only this one bomb right? So if we close the connector doors, the other 4 reactors won't get damaged. It'll be bad, but at least they'll be ok." McDanish suggested.
"True, but that doesn't completely save us. See the reactors are all connected, feeding power between the 5 of them in a sort of loop to generate more. So if one goes, the loop is broken."
"And the rest are useless. DAMNIT!!!"
"Well hang on McD, therein lies our hope." Warlock had that glimmer.
"Huh? What hope?"
"If we can reroute the connections from this reactor so that the other 4 are the loop and this one is excluded, then seal the doors, the reactors will continue to run."
"Ok, so lets get started then." And the two got to work.

Cassandra Edwards was sitting in her Reveler jeep, not far from Tech Haven, looking back on Neocron. She took a sip of Blue Poisongland Chardonay '42 and reached for her specialised hack tool. She entered a command and pushed execute.

Simon and Ulam were too close to the control centre. They were killed instantly in the blast. The entire control centre was annihilated in the blast. The survivors began digging through the rubble, while one contacted Reza.

Reza nearly crapped himself at the news. He returned to his apartment immediately and got on the city PA system. This was one message he had thought he'd never need to give.
"Citizens, may I have your attention please. It pains me to have to announce this on what was looking like being such a festive day, but announce it I must. This message also goes out to the wastelands and I hope all runners, enemies included, might hear it. A few minutes ago in a cowardly attack, the Tangent branch of Genetic Replicator Control was attacked and bombed. The control nexus inside was destroyed. As a consequence; the following will affect you all.
Firstly, it will be impossible to teleport anywhere using the generep system. All travel will need to be done on foot or by vehicle (groans went up from the world). Secondly, if you lose your backpack during this time, it will not be remotely tagged with a recaller. Thus you will not be able to gain your inventory back through the genereps (a few people stopped trying). Thirdly and most importantly... if you are killed during this down time, there will be no replicators to lock on and clone you back. As a result, anyone who dies during this time will experience perma-death (at this, the populace broke into a cold sweat. Centuri and NDA looked on the fields of Dome forces in renewed horror at the realisation that they were stuck, and that if they died today, it would be the end)." Reza deactivated the PA system, but suddenly a new voice broke through:
"Citizens," and Reza went pale, "I believe you have all heard of my little present for you all," Reza began to sweat hard, "I hope you all are enjoying it," and Reza realised he'd never loathed a voice as much as he was loathing Cassandra's voice right now.
"I have bombed the Generep control unit. You can all choose to risk your lives to come and get me, or you can choose to hide in the 'safe zones' till the crisis is over. Its your choice..."

Having heard the announcement in the Subway, Wannabe and LVirus were about to pull out, but the last of the new rubble fell away. They both looked on in horror. Several composite explosives were seeded behind it, and were ticking down to zero fast. The two fled the tunnels. Wannabe began broadcasing, but there was no one listening to him...

"... but it may be hard to stay where you are. For here comes my second present..."

The timers ran to zero and the charges blew. The ground in Pepper Park 2 heaved upwards in a groan and then exploded upwards. Windows shattered, strippers were killed and copbots buried in debris. The Black Dragons HQ entrance was caved in. And then they came.

It suddenly became clear what the noises were people had been reporting in Pepper Park. The bots that Wannabe had sealed off several months ago had remained in the tunnel. And now they had a way out. Swarms of Scythe bots and Ceres Veterans began pouring through the gash in Pepper Park and began to annihilate everything in sight. Runners fled for their apartments, only to have Scythe bots tear through the walls after them. In the initial assault, 43 runners were perma-killed.

"...have fun Reza." she smirked.
"You Bitch!!" he broadcast back, not caring who heard, "you dare turn on Neocron? You dare turn on me? And today of all days?"
"You're damn right. I have had it with this city. I run the whole city, me, by myself, yet all the credit goes to you and all the blame comes to me. And I will never miss having to go down under your desk you pig." (the citizens raised eyebrows, but few were suprised).
"You will die screaming Edwards. I shall see to that."
"Oh, I don't think so. You have Dome forces spreading out through Pepper Park, runners perma-dying, and close to a million Dome troops marching from the north as we speak. You think you have time to catch me?"
"Lets find out." He went to order the release of an X-borg unit to hunt her down.
"Yes, lets. Whats a good act of treason without trump cards eh? Time I played my big one." Reza paused, "you wanted to celebrate July 4th? Independence day? Well you got it wrong. Today is R day. Today is the day I see out the last wishes of the last true leader of Neocron. Today I unleash the contents of Regants Legacy upon thee!" In a convulsive frenzy she hammered the controls. And the wastelands shook.

"Thats the signal. Unleash the army!" Garn Warner yelled.

Centuri was the first to fire, and NDA followed suit as the forces of the Dome flooded towards them. There was no turning back.

The gates of Regants Legacy and all its restraints were blown to kingdom come. The Legacy was laid wide open, and its contents began to march.

Reza's command panel indicated the Legacy was open. Suddenly showing his age, he collapsed in his seat, old and weary. He knew what was in there, and the horror of it overwhelmed him.

NUTS could be seen on the horizon, and Hurricane breathed a sigh of relief. Suddenly, the earth around him shook and quaked and he was thrown from the roof to the waters below. Spluttering and dirty, he dragged himself to the bank. Expecting to be attacked again, he pulled his rifle ready to fight, but the creatures had fled. He walked back to the path and looked towards the legacy. And it was fortunate he was already wet, so that no one would ever see the piss stain forming.

Marching towards him were hundreds upon hundreds of PowerArmour wearing GenTanks. Each one was armed with either a Cursed Soul or a MoonStriker. And they were annihilating everything in sight. Hurricane sensing the danger activated his scope on his Redeemer and opened fire at range. Shot after shot flew and struck the nearest unit in the head. Not only did it not take damage, it didn't even slow down. Hurricane looked on in fear. But he didn't look for long as he began running his ass off to get away from the incoming missiles. He linked up with NUTS and in an out-of-breath kind of style gave them the heads up. They fell back to the base camp and acquired all their firepower and the Mechs. As a clan, they engaged the oncoming forces. Shot after shot from Pain Easer, Cursed Soul, Holy Lightning, Gat cannon, Redeemer, First Love and the Mechs slammed into their foes. And not a scratch was made.
"What directly the (censored) are these (censored) things" Eva began spitting out.
"Ok, I know its powerarmour, but COME ON. They're not taking little damage, they're taking NO Damage."
"Fall back... Now." Ithaqua pulled everyone away. The units began to split into two groups. One followed after them, heading to Neocron, the other marched North and, passing by TH, turned towards the Dome.

Cassandra drove onwards towards the Dome, her hair blowing in the wind, and smiling more than she ever had in the last 4 years.

"Ok, I'm ready, lets thread the cables through now." McDanish yelled.
"Ok, we'll do it one set at a time, to limit the power outtages."
"Got it." And they disconnected the first set.

The city blacked out completely. Emergency generators kicked in for basic systems (the radiation shield and communication networks to name two) but ultimately the city was pitched into chaos. And then the Scythe-bots struck. Those that were able activated their LaserSwords and held the line. The light from over 130 laserswords was enough to illuminate the battle in an eerie orange and blue.

Reza was giving orders as best he could in the confusion. He had ordered Megaman and CDV to overtake and kill Cassandra Edwards, so they moved on at great haste. He ordered Tangent clans to repair the generep controller and to check the Mainsewer power conduits. They promptly reported that the Mainsewer conduits were fine. This left Reza to worry about why the power was failing. The only reason he could think of was a cut in the power supply. But when the power came on again for a short time, he feared that something had happened to the reactors. At that moment, a call came through from Ithaqua.
"Reza, we got trouble out here. There's these Gentank things heading our way..."
"Yes I know, the DeltaGens."
"The what?"
"Oh well, like it matters now. The Gentanks you see walking the streets these days are GammaGens, the 3rd generation of Gentank, designed for combat, but capable of acting within a society as a member, albeit a stupid member. The ones you see before you are DeltaGens, the 4th generation. They were designed during the Ceres war as the final weapon. Ammoral killing machines. Just point them at a target and they will annihilate it. They do not age, they do not need food. They just need air and ammo. Furthermore, at the time of their creation a freak accident created a special alloy for their powerarmour that has never been duplicated. That armour is indestructible."
"Oh gee, and someone saw fit to deploy such things?"
"Regant wanted to win. I think you're experiencing his desperation right now aren't you?"
"Almost."
"Hmn?"
"As you said, their armour is indestructible, but they are not. Our Aggressive Monk Diesel has found a way to destroy them."
"What? The entire army of York couldn't do that... how?"
"As you said, all they need is air and ammo. And to get air, that suit has airholes. So it is possible to get fire into their suits to kill the DeltaGen inside. He's using a Fire Apocalypse, but he's only one man. We could use some help to help kill off the rest."
"Fire you say? Good work NUTS, I have just the thing. We may survive this one yet. Get your people clear."
"Understood."
"This is Reza to NEXT special projects. I am authorising the use of the project now. Proceed to these co-ordinates and destroy the targets."

A gate in the city wall, half a mile above the ground opened up and from it spewed 12 NEXT FireWreathes. Each one was a long range combat aircraft, the first flying combat vehicle built in Neocron ever. Each fighter packed 4 Plasma Plasma Cannons and a full payload of Napalm Missiles. The fighters formed up and came down to 100 ft above the surface. They quickly located the targets and unloaded on the ravine they were in. Hundreds of DeltaGens were engulfed in fire and they fell. NUTS cheered on as the fighters flew overhead, then banked east and returned home. They then entered a holding pattern around the city.

"They're destroyed? Excellent, maintain patrol around the city until we can solve this power failure to the Wall shields." Reza had hope once again. He had already dispatched the rockets containing 3 squads of X-borgs at the gate to Dome of York. They would not last long, but they would cause chaos. CDV was hot on Cassandra's heels, and the brave souls in the city had already begun to look like they might conquer the bots belching forth from Pepper Park 2. But the last transmission from NDA said they weren't out of the woods yet.

"Ok, 4 more sets of cables and we're done!" McDanish yelled, "How much time?"
"47 minutes." Warlock called back. They carried forward.

"Will this tunnel never end?" Danae panted. She and SpikeZ had been running all night long and were still unable to reach anyone.
"Just keep running honey, we've got no other choice."

"The East walls collapsing! Take cover!" The wall of Soliko crumbled and the defenders fled back. NDA was still fighting and were still all accounted for, thanks to the fact that their attackers weren't all that interested in them. The Dome forces were flooding past them, heading for Neocron, and were only attacking in passing. NDA saw it their duty to kill as many as possible, but were not going to risk perma-death to do so. The wall collapsing seemed like a sign to retreat to the underground section. Only Centuri remained above as the scout, under cover.

Dome forces were flooding hard and fast towards the city walls. Only a few were prepared to defend from the outside of the wall, as the last time had been a slaughterhouse, saved only by the Genereps. Thus the FireWreathes were the first line of defense. They were ordered to assault the column on its way towards the city, and assault they did. With every pass, hundreds of Dome forces were lost. The fighters were exceeding expectation. Meanwhile, Reza was gathering all CityAdmin clans to him and selecting specific personel to go to a special room full of terminals beneath CityAdmin.

NUTS returned to the city, and joined the gate defense for a short time, but battered and weary, they feared they were not combat ready any longer, so re-entered the city.

Wannabe linked up with NUTS once they returned, and told them of all that had been going on.
"So Edwards has screwed us all?" Ithaqua asked.
"Damn straight. Nearly killed me and LVirus."
"Um, Wanna, wheres Warlock and McDanish?"

Despite the air barrage, the forces of the Dome drew closer. This was largely due to the emergence of what had been causing the dustclouds. Dome of York had unleashed Hovertanks. Shrouded in dust and much faster than everything else, the fighters were having a much harder time destroying them. As a result, York forces were able to bring their artillery to bear on the wall. The defenders fled and it looked like breaching time.

"That's it, last one! Connected!" McDanish slammed the cable together, and the 4 generators were connected. The city had guaranteed power again.
"We're out of time, lets go!" Warlock grabbed him and pulled him towards the door. The gates had been set to shut 5 seconds before the bomb was set to go. The two ran towards the gate, which had begun to close. Just at the very last, they both tripped on some of the broken drones. Warlock tucked his arm and rolled on, sliding through the gap. McDanish fell. He looked at the now closed door, and then at the timer.
"This can't be good. . . "

The bomb detonated and the city shook. Warlock was catapulted by the force into the wall behind him and lost consciousness. The 5th generator was destroyed, but power remained.

The artillery opened fire at the wall. The shield flickered and then powered up. The artillery fire bounced off harmlessly. In the next pass, the FireWreathes annihilated the artillery. Cheers from the citizens went up as the Dome forces, seeing that the shield was not down as promised, turned to flee. Hundreds of runners, now fueled by hope and adrenalin, ran out and grabbed their Mechs and began the pursuit, under the air cover of the city's saving graces.

Centuri saw an opening and climbed down from Soliko. The forces had left a gap, which he passed through unnoticed, and he set course for Dome of York.

Cassandra pulled up just in front of the Dome. Behind her marched the DeltaGens. Garn looked out perplexed.
"Well this is certainly unexpected. You bring me new troops as well?"
"Not quite, Garn. I bring these troops to kill you." and Cassandra began her second act of treachery. The DeltaGens poured towards the Dome, and the Dome forces, split between defending the Dome and retreating from Neocron, fought back as best they could.

"Alright, its time," Reza yelled to the terminal room, "HackNet is activated, BEGIN!!!" And the handpicked hackers of CityAdmin began to remote hack. The transmission was beamed through the Uplinks through to Dome of York. In an instant, they hacked the pop-up turrets of the Dome and took control of them. And then Reza's grin returned.

The turrets opened fire on everything. The Dome forces caught between, to their mind, invincible DeltaGens, and their own turrets were quickly obliterated. The DeltaGens then wrecked the turrets, and proceeded inside to annihilate the populace.

Sid, seeing his guards distracted, took this opportunity to kill them. He then fled into the corridor to be confronted by the DeltaGens. They looked at him, and stepped aside. Confused, he carried on. The DeltaGens then carried out their act of genocide.

Cassandra cackled away as her forces flooded into the Dome, spilling a river of blood. Her funtime was cut short, as Centuri appeared behind her and demanded she take her hands off the controls. She obeyed.
"Damn you. You would unleash Armageddon on us, just to kill them?"
"No you fool, I unleash Armaggedon to rule them. You're looking at the Queen of the Dome." and she grinned.
"Actually I'm looking at a corpse with nice make-up..." and he took aim.

"Finally I got a signal!" Danae exclaimed, she activated full broadcast, "attention all Neocron. I don't know how late we are reporting this but we discovered a plot to bomb the city (there were no suprises to this news). We found out that the bombers (Centuri paused to listen) were CDV. I repeat, Megaman's CDV planted the bombs. I heard Psycho Killa down in the place where they made the bombs (Reza broke into a cold sweat again)."

Centuri took aim, but it was for nothing. He was shot from behind by Megaman.
"Welcome to your new home, my General." Cassandra sneered. Megaman grinned, and killed Centuri.
"I think we're gonna like it here." and the new lords of the Dome entered their new home. Cassandra promptly found and confronted Sid, offering him the position to head up their Assassination Guild. He did not decline. And the grin of MJS grew.

Centuri respawned in Plaza 1.
"What the hell? I thought that was it?"
"We got the control unit working again, looks like just in time." One of the techs reported.
"Not quite in time." Warlock, injured and covered in dust, carrying a large burden over his shoulder emerged through the covered hole in the wall.

R plus 1 day...
Reza ordered another squadron of FireWreathes created, and a special team to begin repairs to the reactor and the pump stations, based on Warlock's report. Warlock himself was asked to head the team, but for the time being, he was otherwise engaged.

Danae and SpikeZ were asked to show the location of the bomb lab, but they demanded a rest and some form of transportation before braving that walk again.

The Powerarmour suits from the deceased DeltaGens was melted down and forged into the new casing for the GeneRep control unit, to ensure such an incident could not be easily replicated.

The burial took place just south of Tech Haven, McDanish's original home. A simple gravestone can be found there, simply enscribed
"McDanish. In Memorium. This is A Gravestone. It signifies that there is a grave here" His friends felt it needed to be obvious.

Until next time...

R.I.P. McD...

Well, heh, after Issue 20 some fortnight ago I asked which type of issue you preferred, the short comedy ones or the lengthy plot ones. Having noticed the post views shot up by about a thousand views in less than a day after Issue 30 went out, I think I have my answer.

Anywho, I'm glad you all enjoyed the Issue. I'm not sure when the next one will be as I think I broke 9 fingers writing that one. But in the meantime, if you're on Pluto and you got an anecdote to share, have a look around, and you might catch Ned walking around I've already had a few interesting people come over and share some stories with me, a few of which I might be using with a little reworking.

So, thanks for the kind comments, I'll get back to work and hopefully have some more NERD's ready in the near future.

Yes I will be talking with the site's manager in the very near future, not only to get the latest issues posted but also to give him the updated character bio's and the first parts of the Encyclopedia of NERD.

As far as new issues are concerned, you'll all have to forgive me, but a certain stress attack in real life kinda broke my funny bone for a time, causing not only the delay in NERD's but also by total absence from all things Neocron.

But not to fear, feeling better now and fingers have got that typing feeling again, so I should have some more stuff for you real soon.

.... you think that's something to be happy about?

*watches the Mods circling around with pointy daggers*

Ned: You guys don't look too happy.
Mods: We have to mod this damn thing.
Ned: Not my fault, the people want to speak.
Odin: This freakn post is killing the forums. Kill it
*Odin struck down by the divine hand of popularity*

Ned: *does the Dance of Departure*

Good Gravy on babequed Yak wings!!! What have I done?

I've created an entertainment medium without offering any form of... good stuff... to my readers. This must change. So must my underwear.

So, the staff of NERD are proud to bring you in the next exciting issue, a stunning look at where the creatures of Neocron came from. From sewer rats to the peculiar TerrorMauler, the nightmarish dragonflies all the way through to Betty...

I just have to finish this 2000 word Law report first...

I AM NOT A LAWYER!!!!!
I said I had to write a Law Report, the two are not the same.
It's for a business course on Contract Law where an understanding of the law of contracts is needed, not a degree in evil... i mean Law.

NERD Issue # 031

A Biology Lesson

Hello Boys and Girls, today we have a very special reporter. He got out of BED just to write this article. Professor Francis Markom of the Biotech Ecology Department has for a long time mentioned to the NERD staff that he wanted to educate the populace about the origins of the creatures we all see every day. So, to that end, we now begin our very informative look into the History of the Creatures of Neocron...

Sewer Rat:

Hello children. This is Professor Markom here, to give you all an itty bitty lesson about where Sewer Rats came from. (one of the NERD offices coffee runners reads over the Professors shoulder at this point and starts running to find NERD Editor) Long ago in the streets, sewers and subways, on the wharfs and in the coffee containers throughout the city of New York, there were rats. Not the naughty waughty wats...err... rats that we know today, but the much smaller and less dangerous versions. They were usually no bigger than two hands long and looked like a big turd with eyes and a tail. Now, after the cleansing light, these creatures were part of the surviving populace of the worlds ecology. However, their normal food supply of garbage and human wastes was rather limited.
(Note from Editor: I messaged Professor Markom around about now. The conversation went like this:
NERD Editor: Professor, I've had an employee inform me of your writing style.
Prof. Markom: Yes, the children should be able to relate to my hip yet easy to understand phrasings.
NERD Editor: Professor, no children read our articles. You're writing this report for war-hardened adults.
Prof. Markom: Oh... thats... bugger.
From this point on he will stop treating you like a 3 year old, or, you know... Ben.)
Most of it was irradiated and not fit even for rat consumption. Having no choice, the rats turned on themselves. In a sick canabalistic feeding frenzy, rat-kind munched down on rat-kind. This change to a purely carnivourous diet was not without problems. Though the rats ingestion system was able to digest meat, it was not meant to do without vegetation. Thus, years of poor eating caused the rats to form skin lesions, their teeth to deteriorate, and the pupils of their eyes to completely white out. The only advantages were that their remaining teeth were over time formed into the sharpened form of carnivours, and their added protein intake caused them to grow larger and larger.
In the course of time, the vegetation began to recover, and the rats were able to begin ingesting the necessary minerals and vitamins they needed for healthy living. They maintained their excessive size, and their taste for flesh, and their bodies are fairly weak, but they are growing healthier.

Roaches:
The Ceres Discs made mention that should a Nuclear War destroy the world, the only surviving things would be the Roaches and Michael Jackson. It seems they were right on both counts. Roaches have remained untouched for millions of years, and chances are when we have killed ourselves off, the city of Neocron will be populated by Roaches (probably under the control of a Dictator Roach... somethings will never change.)(NERD Apologises to CityAdmin, we don't wanna get shot. Shoot the Professor, its his fault)(Hey...)(Write your damn article Markom).

Dragonflies:
Many have speculated that the dragonflies of today are the offspring of the dragonflies of old, just made bigger by years of radiation. The truth is that no amount of radiation makes a creature bigger. It makes their cancerous tumors bigger, and makes them dead, but not bigger. In fact, the truth about the dragonflies is far more horrifying. The original creatures we knew as Dragonflies actually died off during the Cleansing Light and became an extinct species. Their story ended there, but anothers story began.
For while radiation does nothing for creatures, it does wonders for virus'. Yes, there was a virus back in those days called 'Influenza' or the Flu for short. Seeing that the human race was by far and large wiped out, and that to strike down the survivors would probably not get it very far, Influenza, empowered by radiation splicing its Ribonucleac acids (RNA) it began to mutate into a different strain, the Flidenza virus. This virus did not need to enter a host to cause damage, it just latched onto the skin of any living creature and ciphoned materials to duplicate itself. Then, instead of multiplying the virus and spreading, it stuck together and formed bonds between the individual virus, forming a larger cluster of virus cells. Eventually the virus became large enough to be seen by the naked eye and was named Drifensia, the drifting pain. Acting much like a mosquito, it would continue to latch onto anything that lived and grab what it needed to continue its growth.
After a time, time, and an ad break, the Drifensia became the size of what the common housefly used to be before the Cleansing Light. At this time, it developed a digestive system and began to feed. The people of that time lived in terror of this new horror. Fast, small and ravenous, the 'Dragons Spawn' began biting at human flesh, leaving burning contusions on their victims. With the taste of flesh, blood, and most importantly a source of Deoxyribonucleac Acids (DNA) the Dragons Spawn began to fully develop as a living organism, including sexual reproductive organs. Once the Dragons Spawn figured out that you had to find a Dragons Spawn of the opposite sex (a few too many incidents took place trying to figure that one out) they began to breed and grow. And so it was that the Dragons Spawn, fully grown to the size of a small bird, able to reproduce at will and bloodthirsty, were loosed upon the world. Their shape and form were highly similar to the images of Dragonflies on the Ceres Discs, so when the discs were discovered, the great minds of the time automatically assumed they were the same things. And thus the name DragonFlies came to be. But you know the truth; the only way to beat Dragonflies is with bedrest and a nice hot drink (cause you all know you can't shoot the tiny little bastids).

Mutants & Aggressors:
It seems I do not need to detail where these beings are coming from. Apparently NERD Editor in a previous Issue explained the 'foul' origins of this poor toilet race.

(At this point the Professor decided to take a leak on the office potplant. He unfortunately left his keyboard unattended, and one of the janitors decided to add his two cents)

Dogs:
I don't know whats up with these things man. I hear dogs used to be mans best friend right, but... like in the times of BETA 2 (If I have to explain what that stands for again, someones gonna die. Ned) those dogs were like huge man, teeth as big as swords, crap as big as me and a johnson that... well, its not likes I was staring or nothin...

(the Janitor was subdued by security at this point and forced to clean up the good Professors tinkle spills)

Dogs:
Now the origin of... oh, I already did this, must be getting forgetful... oh well, time to move on then.

Launcher Cyclops:
Perhaps one of the strangest creatures in terms of origins. Believe it or not, Launcher Cyclops are actually quite a new breed. What happened was: once upon a time there was a clan of runners known as Phlebs. Now one day these runners were given possession of some early model hoverbikes, and they decided to go cruising at 300 mph. Unfortunately, during a synching incident, they were propelled across 2 sectors and into a rocket testing dump in the Wastelands. The resulting mess of hover technology, rocket packs and flesh could not be returned to normal, so good ol' Professor X was called in. After repeatedly yelling "I'm a Constructor, not a Plastic Surgeon", he was talked into attempting to set things right. He failed (yes, it was at that time that The DEVS introduced Construction Fails) and as a result the misshappen Launcher Cyclops were born. Their first action was to annihilate the good Professor, but thats another story. Now they live and breed by assimilating flesh and busted hoverbikes. Its a sad truth: When cruising the Wastelands, don't zone, or you may endure a fate worse than death.

Arachnids:
When I thought I was writing this article for kiddies, I deleted this section due to its disturbing nature, but now I need to add it back. Readers of NERD will be familiar with the antics of Vain. What you may not know is that Vain's Grandfather, Pompous, once tried to screw a small spider. Unfortunately he succeeded in propogating it and after 17 weeks (small spiders incubation period) it gave birth to Vain's Uncle, a hideous half breed. Spider from the waist up, man from the waste down, it was a true freak of nature. Unfortunately for it, Pompous was clumsy and stepped on it immediately after birth, thus ending its life. However, 20 years later, Vain's father, Arrogance, repeated his fathers mistake and found a Spider Queen. After boinking it repeatedly, he got it knocked up and it gave birth to the very first Arachnid. That's right folks, the first Arachnid is Vain's brother, and the one's we fight are his neices and nephews. Its a twisted family. We're petitioning to have Vain castrated as we speak.

Hoverbots:
Now here's an interesting creature. There are many false theories about them. Some believe that they are pure machines, this is wrong. Some believe that Dome of York scientists made them along with the Warbots, this is false. Others believe that Fallen Angel Scientists screwed up and made them, this too is false. The truth is this. During the Cleansing Light, a group of car fanatics hid a large number of Chevrolet's in a cave. However, during the war, the cave was partially affected, and many of the fanatics became fused to the chassis of the cars. Over time, they came to overcome this little problem and were able to move around the cave. After 300 years of breeding, the children of these fanatics were born part car, with an oil intake system in their backs and an exhaust pipe up there... never mind.
Now, as technology improved, so to did the fanatics offspring. They found that they were able to upgrade themselves to have 'more power'. They enhanced their epidermal layers to form a nice chrome finish. They did away with the use of their legs in favour of a hover system. And again, over time and a donut, they encased their entire organic being in an outer hull of steel. Then they altered their breeding pattern to self clone part of their genetic makeup inside a loading bay hanger where once their asses had been, enfuse it with technological parts, and fart out another child. And through this process of technological crappage, there came into being bigger and better turds... err children that could fly higher, move further, crap bigger and live longer. But as veterans of BETA will remember, the original Hoverbots were incredibly weak, being ranked only 1 bar, and could be killed with one bullet, and they were killed a lot. The survivors banded together and began eating Tech Haven Turrets for resources and then Warbots for firepower and evolved into the monsters we know today.

TerrorMaulers:
This is the most frightening creature of all. Have you ever watched a TerrorMauler when it fights, how on top of the fire and the pain, they keep lunging forward? Ever wondered why? Well tracing their descendancy was tricky but it has been done. It seems in the year 2005 an annoying little man in the old USA entered the first ever form of cryo-stasis. He endured this process for many a year until just before the Cleansing Light came. He exited the tube, but the doctors realised that, being such an energetic and annoying man, he had far too much pent up energy, and he began to start belching fire to vent this energy. In the course of the doctors investigation of this phenomenon, the Cleansing Light came, and the little man was thrown by an explosion into a laboratory filled with DNA samples which he became infected by. Strains of Labrador, Rhinoscerous and Giraffe became one with him and his shape mutated into the first form of the TerrorMauler, much smaller, but in all respects the same creature. Still venting fire out of every orifice, this creature stalked the radiated lands till it came upon a field of surviving vegetation. The creature ate the entire field in two mouthfuls. Then it realised that the field was that of halapenio peppers and the fire belching got worse. It also caused the creature to bend over and unleash a giant fireball that actually contained its first child. For the doctors had known even before the mutation that the annoying personwas neither man nor women, but a gender completely of its own (though it insisted on being called a man) and that the only way it would ever have a child was if it learned to make one by itself. And so it was that the race of TerrorMaulers learned to produce asexually and took over the deserts. Who would have thought one annoying little person who didn't want to die and had too much energy from all that aerobics would create such a species. Damn you Richard Simmons, you've doomed us all.

(The Professor started doing Richard Simmons impersonations around about now, so we threw him out of the building).

Until next time...

Heh, I think I'll let Betty live a while longer. I've already perma-deathed 3 guys in the story so far, time for some life!

Anywho, my weekend should hopefully be nice and free, so I can get some NERDage done.

Musical clams huh.... hmn....

Ben, what faction are you?
I'm just curious
*starts sharpening the NERD bat*

Request from Ned:
Leave the bravado at the door, this post is for fun guys. Skip the trash talking and prove who's right with your guns ingame.

Thx in advance.

For any of you who've done comedy writing or serialised writing, I think you'll get what I'm about to say:

Some 8 years ago I started writing a story, not unlike NERD. It was written for my friends in High School, featuring embelished versions of themselves with stupid names and in even more ridiculous situations. The story had no real purpose or plot, I just wrote it day by day, with whatever I could come up with. And like NERD, they received it pretty well, lol'ing a lot. And because they were enjoying it so much, I kept pushing myself to put out a new chapter every day. Well this went ok for about 3 weeks, but after that I started putting out chapters that, essentially weren't that good. They'd have maybe one or two chuckles but otherwise they were just me grinding out more words for the sake of writing.

So I've learnt from that lesson, which is why when writing NERD's, I will not put out an issue until I've come up with adequate ideas for it and until I'm happy with it, no matter how much you guys beg. I really wanna give you your NERD doses as often as possible, but more than that I want to give you GOOD NERD doses.

So, as I carry on with this... rather weird issue, please take the time to find someone with an LE in and make them feel welcome, hand em a beer, a milky ren, and direct them to the NERD post :)

Oh, and for the Blue Tech members I was talking to earlier, yes, I wasn't kidding, the Pants Virus will be hitting soon...