Nerd 1 - The Archive

(Opening Disclaimer: Nothing mentioned about Megaman here is to be taken seriously. This is not meant to suggest anything about him, its solely for comedic effect).

NERD Issue # 011

The Change: Part 4 - Your Friendly Neighbourhood Megaman

The work towards gaining a clankey was going well. ASS had acquired enough money to buy one and were now just reconsolidating their clan funds a bit before proceeding with the transaction.

Today, all of ASS had gathered in Tech Haven to clean up. The Fallen Angels council had offered 1 million credits if any group of runners was willing to respackle the walls and clean the gore off the walls. Reef had decided this would be the perfect opportunity to make some cash and clean up TH's act.

Warlock and Keyser Soze were standing guard over the two Genereps. It would be a pain in the ASS (pun intended) if SODOM or NUBI chose to strike while they were cleaning up their previous strikes. Reef and Mako Tanaka were moving one of the doors back onto its rollers. Soulburner was mopping up some oil and blood stains near the latest Security Bot slaying incident. Others were fixing craters in the walls and replacing seats. Evangelion, pride of the strippers union and protector of all redheads was standing around filing her toenails when a visitor came up behind her.

"Hello." Kobra said.
"Hi." Eva responded.
"I'm not really here."
"Huh?"
"I'm not in Neocron at all."
"But you're standing right in front of me."
"I'm not really here."
"Then how are you talking to me?"
"I love Shadowbane."
"Huh? Whats Shadowbane?"
"Shadowbane is great."
"But what is it?"
"There is nothing wrong with Shadowbane."
"Ohh....kay...."
"I must go now." Kobra turned to go.
"But you said you were not here, how can you go if you weren't here to start with?"
"I err... damnit!!" and with that he stormed off.

Despite the interruption by the man who supposedly isn't around anymore, work proceeded on pretty well. Not since its doors were opened had Tech Haven looked so neat and clean. The workcrew began to work its way towards the Fallen Angels head office; the open area with several tables and a bunch of bald guys in blue shirts typing randomly on computers as if they were actually doing work.... sort of like Microsoft Employees (lawsuits from Microshaft can be sent to nerd_editor@idontcare.com).

However, all of a sudden, all hell broke loose as Megaman, bringer of death and destruction, and the snazziest dressed Smurf in all of Neocron broke through and stood before all of ASS.

He looked at them all, raised his left hand, snapped his fingers and pointed his index finger at them like a gun and said "Eyyyyy." Fonzy style.

.....

Everyone wondered what horrible experience would follow, but he just stood there going "Eyyyy" for about 10 minutes straight. The tension was unbearable until suddenly Demon-surge and Torque leapt in behind Mega.
"Don't you fools know who he is??"
"Uhh... Megaman?" McDanish responded. For once his stating the obvious was relevant.
"Sh*t man, that ain't right," Torque yelled.
"Yeah man, he's not Megaman, hes THE Megaman."
"Ok so what do you want Mr. The Megaman?"
"I'm here to say.... Eyyyyy." People fell over anime style.
"You guys just don't realise what you're up against here," Demon-surge said, "Well let us explain it to ya..." and with that, Demon and Torque started moving around in perfect syncronisation, employing dance moves that made N'Sync look talented. And then it began...
"What...." Reef began.
"The...." Keyser continued.
"F...." everyone chimed in.

And thus began their musical performance
(The following lyrics are sung to the tune of the Spiderman TV series themesong. All Rights Reserved by NERD Publications.)

"Megaman, Megaman,
Kicks your ass just because he can.
Holds a gun, any size.
Crushes men like they were flies.
Watch out! Here comes the Megaman."

"Is he strong?
His armours blue.
Kicks your ass until your through.
Standing tall,
Gun in hand.
Filling chat with his uber spam.
Hey there! Here comes the Megaman."

"Like a killer true, he is there at the crime.
Your quickbelt in hand, he escapes just in time."

"Megaman, Megaman.
Nasty neighbourhood Megaman.
Will this man ever get bored?
Pk'ing is his reward.
That Right! He is The Megaman!!"

"Great unmerciful radiated fluffy poodles!!" Byron screamed, "That was the worst song since Oops I Did it again." (Runner Britney Spears in Plaza 3 started looking around as if someone had called her name.)
"Eyyyy... you don't mock my backup singers."
"They do backup for you too? Kill me now..." Warlock groaned.
"I'll do just that." and Mega lifted his Cursed Soul to his shoulder ready to annihilate all before him.
"Say goodbye and ....EYYYYY!!!!!"
"Why would I want to...." Warlock never finished that sentence as he saw what Mega had reacted to. There was Soulburner, latched onto Mega's Blue Power armour butt, humping away wildly.

"Guys, its a bit big, but this is just like a MechTurtle!!!"
"GET IT OFF. GET IT OFF.... Eyy."
"Hold still boss, we'll get him." But Megaman wasn't waiting. He ran off screaming at the horrifying feel of an ASS humping his ass. He made it all the way to Gaia before Soul was spent and fell off.
"Well that was.... disturbing."
"Let us never speak of it again."
And with that they all went back to work.

And so it was that at the end of 4 days, with only 38 casualties, 2 deaths and a sprained testicle (guess who that was), the former members of ASS completed the renovations of Tech Haven. The Council of Fallen Angels, unlike Reza's goons, actually paid up the agreed sum and the money pool was increased by 1 million nc.

After 29 days of continuous labour from all members of ASS, they had finally acquired all the funds they would need to get back into clan life. Though they had experienced the joys of being solo runners (poor communication lines, difficult to find anyone for a poke, no backup, no clan hq for collecting goods) they felt the could drag themselves back to clan life.

The question now was, what would they call it?

Until next time...

Oh and for your information, if anyones interested....

There is a soundfile of the Megaman Song actually being sung. There's no music but its still great. All credit goes to our dearly beloved Danae for lending NERD her vocal skills to record the song.

So if you want it, you'll have to start begging the right people for it.

LOL, well sorry Demon, didn't know that... I'll try to keep you from dancing anymore how's that? Honest I will.....

Well tbh I don't really know Psycho Killa too well so I didn't think I could do a decent parody of him.

If someone wants to tell me some stories about him or anyone else you think should be in there, PM me and I'll try to come up with something.

Ok folks, Issue 11 was the last I had stocked up so the issues will be a bit further apart then they have been (i.e. 11 issues in 3 days). It'll be more like 2 a week from here on out.

Oh and just so everyone knows, work has begun on the next song in Megaman's collection, done to Britney Spheres...erm... Spears' Baby One More Time "Kick Me GM One More Time." Danae is working tirelessly on the vocals and hopefully it'll be ready by the time the lyrics are posted in issue 12 or 13.

We're even hoping to have the Megaman CD availably by June (just kidding).

Ok, back to thinking up weird stuff to type....

At this point I think some credit is due:

Special thanks go out from NERD to:

Shadow, Murkster and the rest of System Shock. You guys have provided great fuel for this story and all my observations of your fights have shown you all to be tough ass bastids.

All of CRC: Particularly Demon-surge for their attacks on Tech Haven. You also have provided me with material to use throughout.

Blue Tech: To all in Blue Tech I thank you for letting me parodise your asses publicly and privately and for letting me bring the story to the NC forums for everyone else to enjoy.

Megaman: Dude, I don't care about anything else I've heard about you. You are one of the true 'personalities' of this game, and I'm glad you've been able to laugh it up as well.

Insideous Wolf/Ying: Another one of the undeniable personalities.... till he went too far. I always appreciated being able to talk with him when I could and for the interesting tales that always surrounded him.

The GameMasters: MoonUnit, CheapLoveMotel and the rest of team also get a big thanks, not only for being part of the story, but for their work in general.

Danae: Special thanks to Our Lady Danae for her vocal talents to bring the Megaman Song and the upcoming "Kick Me GM One More Time" song to life.

Cipher: Thanks also to Cipher for doing the edit work to put the latest song together.

On we go....

I believe Danae, Spikez, Megaman and Hurricane all have the song so far. Perhaps if you offer them Milky Rens etc they'll be nice :)

That's cause you didn't say 'Eyyyyy'.

Anyway, jump on IRC and go to #neocron. Chances are someone in there will have it.

Little tip I learned from Danae...

Say BOOBS!!!

Give them time, they're a shy bunch but eventually they remember where the keyboard is.

I've been delayed a bit by two things:

The first was putting together the pieces for the next song, which took up most of yesterday afternoon for me. The sheer fact that I had to listen to 'Baby One More Time' about a dozen times should be reason enough for you all to pity me...

The second was an irritation from Real Life wasting 6 hours of my time today...

But, I digress

Issue 12 I am hoping to have completed and posted in the next few hours.
Issue 13 will come out once the song is completed and I've stopped laughing at it.

Back to work, busy busy busy....

NERD Issue # 012

The Change: Part 5 - SODOM's EGOS?

Sitting in Club Veronique, a sole individual was sitting at a table. He was smoking a cuban, avoiding the light from the overhead lamps, and trying to get special 'sushi' from the Club Waitresses.
"I wants some good Sushi".
"Please sir, leave me alone."
"I will gets some good sushi..." and with that, he vanished from sight with the click of his fingers.

At long last the members of ASS had put together 12 million nc. They were exstatic about finally being able to put the clan back together.
"Yay, this is great." Lisa jumped for joy.
"I can't wait." Mako bounced around.
"It's makin' me wet." Eva was inappropriate again.
"BOOBIES!!!" Shodough screamed.
"Hmn... his terets is getting worse." Reef looked on at Shodough.
"I'll fix this." Warlock walked straight over to Shodough and nailed him squarely in the testicles with a pair of brassnucks, "Hows that Sho?"
".... GONADS!!!" and he collapsed to the floor, needing some healing feeling from the Monks.
"I think you went too far," Deo pointed out.
"...Anyway," Ithaqua interrupted Sho's girly wimpers, "have we come up with a clan name yet? ASS is out of date. We need something new... something sharp... something..."
"NUTS!!!"
"Nuts? What would it stand for?" Hurricane came racing in at that moment.
"Dudes, I don't feel safe here anymore."
"Why's that?" Ithy asked.
"Cause Megaman's standing in Tech Haven 2 singing Koombaya and the Security bots are doing the Hoki Poki around him. Look!"
And ASS looked...
And ASS was afraid...
And ASS changed factions.

Yes, far too many disturbing things had happened in Tech Haven (Mega's singing recital got even worse when he started doing the CanCan with the Security Bots). Though ASS had always found a place to resting place in TH, it was now time to move on. The recent good-paying employment from NEXT made the choice of a new faction easier.

Thus what had once been ASS of Fallen Angels, was now NUTS of NEXT. The new acronym was 'NEXT's Unqualified Technical Staff'. This essentially described their current position, as the clan was welcomed into NEXT and immediately put to work on a most important assignment.

* * * The Leaders of NEXT would like to offer a warm, welcoming hand to NUTS. We look forward to working closer with NUTS. Your first assignment is a major one. City Admin has finally finished their plans for a massive upgrade of the entire city. A fairly substantial oversight was noticed last year in the city's infrastructure. While Neocron possesses the largest and most sophisticated drainage system ever, it was noted that the city does not have any toilets with which to feed into that system. What this has meant for the personal hygiene of city runners is beside the point. NEXT wants NUTS to take on the project of installing Toilets into all Apartments immediately. * * *

And so NUTS pulled up their workpants and got to work installing Porcelain Thrones. Of course as everyone in Neocron knows, Porcelain is a thing of the past, a relic of the pre world war 3 days. NEXT supplied NUTS with Plastico's. Entirely plastic toilet bowls, that will never decompose, even when the contents of the bowl is.

First on the list was the Tangent clan apartments. NUTS wasn't sure why, but the guess was after the rumoured espionage work Tangent had done against BioTech recently, NEXT wanted to get a leg up on Tangent. And their leg up was to release their NUTS into their apartments.

Now at this point, one might be wondering why NEXT, a company dedicated to transport options, was fulfilling an infrastructure request. The truth was, with the release of the Y Replicants and growing hostilities from a growing enemy in the wastelands, City Admin had no time to deal with basic city maintenance. So the job had been outsourced to the lowest bidder, and NEXT had won the contract.

An added bonus had occured. SODOM's clan apartment needed the toilet upgrade, so workpapers in hand, McDanish, Shodough and Ithaqua began drilling in through the wall to begin the placement of their 'facilities'.
"Ok McD pass me the circular Lasersaw."
"I am passing you the circular Lasersaw."
"Stop stating the obvious."
"I am stopping stating the obvious."
"DUMBASS!!!"
"I am not a dumbass." McDanish replied.
"I said stop stating the.... oh wait, that wasn't obvious."
"Hey...."

Finally the hole was made and Ithaqua climbed through the wall. He needed to announce himself to those in the apartment before they all went nuts and tried to frag him. He went over to the door and opened it slightly, to see how many were about. What he saw was this:

There was Murkster, Shadow and .cylon all standing around a bald headed Psi Monk. That Monk was MoonUnit. Ithaqua couldn't believe it. Why was Moon here, in private chambers with SODOM? Then he thought, maybe he's gonna lock their minds out and send them to Limbo for a while. But he noticed Moon was looking very twitchy and not himself. Lastly Ithaqua noticed the two female runners tied up on the floor. He decided to listen in.

"Alright Moon, have you got the goods?" Moon twitched a little more.
"Yeah... yeah I do. Here they are, 50 artifact 4 slotted Cursed Souls and 20 artifact Holy Lightnings." SODOM nearly soiled themselves.
"Excellent MoonUnit," Murkster said, "and as agreed, two servings of special 'sushi'. Rare breeds indeed. You have particular tastes." Ithaqua looked at the 'sushi'. He was even more shocked to see Danae, Mistress of all Neocron and Yen, long since thought lost from the Neocronian continent, after she decided to try and venture beyond the Heavy Radiation zones in a quest to find something better, were the two women tied up on the floor.
"Sweet (twitch) sushi (more twitching). Alright you can have the (twitch) stuff."
"Pleasure doing business with our now personal EGOS." SODOM started doing that weird group maniacal laughter they do so well, or poorly, depending on your perspective. Shodough came up behind Ithy trying to see what was going on.

All of a sudden a smashing came from the Clan apartments main door. Everyone inside jumped.
"Open Up SODOM. I'm Here For My Woman!!!" came a resounding voice. Danae looked up all excited.
"Crapzor, It's SpikeZ!!" The door gave way as Spikez smashed it down and marched into the room.
"Um... what are you thinking Spikez, you're hopelessly outnumbered." Shadow pulled his Cursed Soul and the others armed up as well. But suddenly SpikeZ removed the cover from the cage he was carrying. Everyone, MoonUnit included recoiled at the sight of the contents. It was a large drooling fluffy rabbit with big ears.
"DAMN!!! It's a KillerBunneH!!" .cylon yelled.
"No, Its TEH KILLERBUNNEH!!" And so it was, SpikeZ had cleverly kidnapped the KillerBunneh himself from his warren and brought him to the standoff. For those that don't know, TeH KillerBunneH is perhaps the single most powerful destructive force in all of Neocronian history. But details of that will have to come later...

Danae and Yen started wriggling round on the floor, sensing the hope of escape was getting stronger. But all of a sudden
"SEXAY!!! BOOTAY!!!" Shodough started screaming uncontrollably. SODOM spun round to face the NUTS in their would be bathroom.
"How'd you get in here?" They yelled.
"We're installing your toilet. I meant to say something but heard you talking." Ithy covered for them.
"Toilet? Dude, hurry up, I've been holding it in for 18 months now." Murkster replied.
"No wonder you always look constipated. How many times do I have to tell you, thats what the Outzone is for!!" said Shadow.
"Actually I always use Point Red..."
"Nah, there's all those guards now... so ..."
Now during this discussion of the best longdrops in Neocron, SpikeZ had made moves to free Danae and Yen. Suddenly MoonUnit, who when the door burst open had gone invisible re-appeared and startled him.
"I (twitch) can't let you (twitch) take them SpikeZ. I needs my 'sushi'."
"MOONUNIT!!! YOU SOLD US OUT!!! Have at thee traitor!" SpikeZ opened the cage, and TeH KillerBunneH went right for MoonUnits jugular. And no amount of Invincibility can protect you from TeH Bunneh. Moon was floored and could not move.
SODOM decided now was a good time to flee. They bolted for the broken apartment door and did not return for 3 days.

Danae and Yen were freed, Moon was allowed to sit up, under the careful watch of the Long Eared One, and Shodough was gagged from saying "NIPPLE!!!" all the time.
"So what do we do with him?" SpikeZ asked.
"MEH!!! I R TeH BunneH!! I will Munch on Yo ASS!!" The fluffy one nattered to itself.
"Let me deal with him." came a voice. Everyone looked around but could see no one. Then they spotted a Roach moving along the floor that suddenly transformed into Critter.
"I'll take MoonUnit from here folks." Critter stated.
"What will you do with him?" McDanish asked (after finally getting out of the wall).
"We shall take MoonUnit to the EGOS Re-education Centre. There he will undergo therapy for his addiction to 'sushi'"
"NOOOOOOO!!!!!" Moon screamed.
"NIPPLE!!!" Shodough had removed his gag.

And so it was that MoonUnit was taken away into the care of the other EGOS. His addiction to 'sushi' had driven him to desparate acts, including getting involved in the affairs of runners daily lives, kidnapping and attempted BunneH abuse.

NUTS finished the work on SODOM's bathroom and left. SpikeZ and Danae got back to gettin' jiggey. Yen disappeared once again. SODOM had to hold it for another 3 days. TeH BunneH is still at large.

Until next time...

NERD strives to bring you, the valued reader, the truth, the whole truth, and only the truth thats funny.

And last issue was a very special issue for good ol' Nerd Editor. I've been running around Neocron looking for a toilet for almost 2 years now and I'm still holding it.

Now many would ask "Hey Lae...err... NERD Editor, why don't you just do what we do and go take a crap in the Outzone?"

Well my friends, here's the shocking truth. A private discussion I had in BED (Biotech Ecology Division) gave me an insight into why that is a bad idea.

For you see, when you go out to Outzone, find a nice little corner, take a squat and do your business, it may seem like you've done no harm. But the radiation and toxins out there have some weird effects. If you were to return some 9 weeks later you would discover your Turd has developed basic motor skills. A few weeks after that and its crawling around. And a full 4 months after that, the piece of crap you discarded has mutated fully into an Aggressor or Mutant Soldier and is looking to kill the Asshole that made it (no pun intended).

So the next time your legs are crossed twice over and you need to go, remember, you're adding to the mutant problem. Wait for NUTS to finish work on your toilet.

Thank you for your attention.

Sorry about that 'where mutants come from' story. It was 5:30 am when i started writing that... probably wasn't advisable....

Anyway....

Thanks to those who've made their replies, thanks to the some 2,800 views received since Saturday and thanks to those who've spammed my ingame mailbox as well.... like I didn't get enough mail.

I am seriously endeavouring to complete Issue # 13 in the next few hours and get it up here along with Danae's latest vocal contribution to the Megaman CD. Once I come up with a few more gags I should be able to get it done.

Anywho... back to work

(Also, later on I'll drop a few background notes in so some of you who are less familiar with Pluto etc can know what inspired this insanity).

(Once again I throw this disclaimer in. Nothing in NERD is to be taken seriously. While it comes from rumours and events that have happened ingame, nothing written here is real. So any mention of guys doing bad things is not to be taken as an accusation, I'm just messing around here...)

NERD Issue # 013

Forbidden Technology

It had been slow going, but NUTS was finally getting a decent speed going on the toilet installations. Already the apartments in Plaza 4, Via Rosso 2 and a few in Pepper Park 3 had been lavatory upgraded, lemon fresh (or what passed for lemon these days).

There was some debate over whether NUTS would be performing the upgrade on Lionn Reza's private apartment, but for now, they had enough work to be carrying on with.

Today, Hurricane, McDanish and Shodough were continuing the upgrades in Pepper Park 2. They'd just finished working on a smaller apartment and had decided to take in some lunch at the nearby store.

"Hang on guys, I'll pay today. Lemme just dump some stuff in my goguardian." Hurricane said.
"Great, thanks man." McDanish replied.
"Sweet... SUCKER!!!.... man." Shodough responded.

Hurricane walked over to the goguardian and began sorting through his stuff to put inside. However, unbeknownst to Hurricane but knownst to us, 3 shady characters were standing by a retro revival jukebox that was playing the 'Happy Days' theme.
"Eyyyy... check this out guys." Megaman reached into his backpack.
"Mega, man what you got there?" Torque tried to peek.
"A Forbidden Technology." he replied. Torque and Demon both looked at him in awe.
"Dude, where'd you get that?" Demon asked.
"Never mind, check it..." and with that Megaman pulled out.... a pair of pants.
"...Mega, its a pair of XXXL pants man, what are you on?"
"Shut up and learn." Megaman pointed the pants at the goguardian and waited...

Hurricane decided that he should put his piles of tech parts in the goguardian. Some of the piles were getting very large and heavy. So he started depositing them into the gogo....

...and when he saw Hurricane putting stuff in the gogo, he reached into the pants and began pulling tech parts out of them.
"Dude, whats going on?" Demon looked quizzical.
"The Pants make a dimensional rip into the goguardian system and allow me to take his stuff. Cool huh?" Megaman took everything Hurricane put into the goguardian. When Hurricane stopped, he put the pants down.

Hurricane turned to go, but realised he needed that last Mutant rifle back to pay for lunch. He went back to the goguardian, but found none of the stuff he just put in it. Horrified, Hurricane quickly acted. He began the Dance of Summoning, that which can gain the attention of an EGOS. The dance is... difficult to describe. (however its roughly like what Fred Durst does in every Limp Bizkit Music video, but you look more constipated.)

But there was no need for the Dance of Summoning. EGOS had been watching ever since someone stole CoDi's pants. They decided to go with the 'light from above' entrance with the Hallelujiah chorus blasting through the city speakers. And down decended... CheapLoveMotel and MoonUnit.

"Wow, MoonUnits out of rehab already?" McDanish pondered.
"Greetings to you all." CheapLoveMotel said in a nice pleasantly calm voice.
"EGOS...RUN!!!" Demon yelled. He took 2 steps when he heard a lot of 'lock and load' sounds. He paused and turned to look at CheapLoveMotel, who had now bristled extra arms and each one was packing a very large gun.
"Y'ALL SIT YER ASSES DOWN OR I WILL CAP YO SORRY ASSES!!!" They sat down, even the ones he wasn't threatening.
"Thats more like it. I loves me guns... LUVS ME GUNS." And CLM started stroking his guns in an almost... well we won't go there. MoonUnit twitched a little.
"So what'chu want Eyyyy?"
"Ok MoonUnit, remember what we talked about. Take it slow and deal with them." CLM went back to mastur...to loving his gun.
"Megaman, you have used a Forbidden Technology. You are well aware of the consequences for such actions." MoonUnit said.
"I serve you 'sushi' and keep the pants?" Moon twitched.
"THATS IT!!! You are so outta here!" Moon prepared to kick Mega's mind out of his body.
"Go ahead." Megaman responded.
"Wha..." Moon looked at him funny.
"Not clear enough, here, I'll make it easy for ya. Boys!!" And with that, Megaman broke into a musical interlude...

(The Following Song "Kick Me GM One More Time" is done to the tune of "Baby One More Time" by Britney Spears. Vocals provided by Danae Recording Studios. Editing by Hurricane Turntables Inc. Lyrics and Publishing by NERD, a subsidiary of LaeminCorp. All Rights Reserved)

To listen to the song, you can download it here: Kick Me GM One More Time

(Torque on his electric keyboard starts hammering keys)
"Oh GM GM....
(Demon-Surge on his kiddy drum set)
Oh GM GM....
(Megaman starts dancing, pointing his power armour pecs at everyone thinking this will gain ratings).
Oh GM GM, how was I supposed to show?
I didn't hack my healthbar?
Oh GM GM, I shouldn't have let, you know...
My Cursed Soul is a cloner.

I'm L33t, no its not a speed cheat
Tell me GM, who's the guy who narked because...

My Uberness is not a cheat.
And I,
I must confess, I am so l33t.
Still so l33t.
When you're not watching, its ganking time,
It's not a Crime!!
Kick Me GM One More Time.

Oh GM GM, I just need to kill this foo
I'll soon have him cryin.
To beat some newbies, there's nothing that I wouldn't do...
But Sh*t, you must have seen it.

Show me, how you're gonna screw me.
Don't just send me to the loading screen because....

15 Monks aren't killing me,
and i
I must digress, I need to pee.
Need to Pee.
NC is lagging so Now I'll find,
Dupes all the Time...
Kick Me GM One More Time.

Oh GM GM,
Oh GM GM, Eyyyyyyyyy

(Torque gets nice piano solo now)
(Megaman starts pouting and trying to look sad and innocent)

Ohh GM GM, how was I supposed to know?
Oh my red soullight is really starting to show

I must confess, that my haxxorness
Is banning me now,
Cause I know i must believe
That you will not hear
About all my crimes!!!
Kick Me GM One More Time!!!

My Haxxorness is banning me
and i
I must confess, I still believe
still believe
When you're not watching its warping time
I've stepped out of Line
Kick Me GM One More Time..... Eyyy...."

(Note: GM is another term for EGOS, referring to their GhostMode)

"OHHH MY FREAKING HELL!!!!" CheapLoveMotel leaped up and hailed fire. Megaman was oddly enough unharmed, Torque and Demon-surge were gibbed in seconds. MoonUnit began the mindkick when Megaman hauled out his Cursed Soul and fired a shot. It slammed into MoonUnits shoulder and he recoiled.
"What the... my invincibility isn't working??"
"Ohh no, he's loaded his Cursed Soul with LAG rounds!!!" CheapLoveMotel yelled (LAG: Lethal Anti GM). Megaman opened fire full auto at MoonUnit. MoonUnit acted quickly and bent time and space before him sending the shots flying over to his side. Unfortunately the shots flew directly towards Hurricane and pounded him into oblivion. His melting corpse fell to the ground.
"Oh My Lionn, they Killed Hurricane." McDanish stated the obvious.
"YOU BASTIDS!!!" Shodoughs Terets kicked in.
"Woops, soz." MoonUnit and Megaman said in unison.
"NP." Hurricane's corpse responded.
"He's talking while he's dead!! Temp kick!!" CLM sent Hurricane's flaming corpse into limbo for five minutes. MoonUnit remembered how to do his job right and snapped his fingers. Megaman's eyes glazed over as he fell to the ground, his mind locked out for a week.
"Yay!! I remember now. I'm good at this stuff."
"So you're ok? Not addicted to 'sushi' anymore?" CLM asked.
"Oh I'm still addicted, I just remembered this," Moon snapped his fingers and 28 strippers instantly appeared around him, "Ohhh yeah."

Until next time...

LOL, me hopes you don't have LAG rounds....

Anyway, as I've said before, if you think you, your clan or someone else should have a character added to the NERD universe, send me a PM via the boards with some names and info and I'll see what I can come up with.