View Full Version : Accountability and You!
Sometimes we get to chit chatting in the old support room, and today something came up regarding accountability. Our policy is, if someone is using your account and they violate the ToS/RoC and the account is banned - we will not unban it because it was your cousin's sister's brother's girlfriend's little brother who really did it, because you'd never do such a thing. ;)
It made us think what the most creative excuse could be since people rarely like to take responsibility for their own actions. O_o I've decided if I ever went over the top, this would be my excuse:
"last night an evil spirit possessed my body, i think it may have been one of satans minions, anyway i went on a rampage, posted tonnes of midget lesbian porn, and called everyone naughty names, and i think i mave have accused one of the moderators of being too fond of donkeys... since yesterday i was taken to a nice catholic priest and the demons have been excorsized. please remove my ban, as it was not my fault, it was the dark lord's. thank you for yourtime!"
It's tuesday, I just finished my shift...it was one hell of a mo(u)rning :p If you ever found yourself in this predicament...what would your excuse be? Btw, I encourage our support staff to post here as well so we can see just have evil your brains are! :lol:
I blame it on Jägermeister. I drank half a bottle and deleted 11 capped characters. 8|
Darth Slayer
21-09-04, 19:20
Can I have some of that lesbian midget porn please Danae......... :lol:
Scorpius.
"Yes ok so I just flame grilled KK so much there's nothing left but a charred hulk, but what you have to keep in mind is that it's all in fun. When I said "couldn't fix a drone bug if I handed them the code to do it myself" it was just a joke. I mean I can't even code. And that part about Odin and the goats...Odin, I dunno he's some God dude isn't he, and gods have horns, or something, and so do goats. All a joke. You're just deliberately misinterpreting me, so please remove my forum ban."
I'm not 100% sure, but I think I've actually used that one already.
greendonkeyuk
21-09-04, 19:23
i would say that i AM very fond of donkeys thankyou very much, but my alter ego shrek actually took control of my body, forced me to eat a vanload of magic mushrooms, drove me to the edge of dover cliffs and threatened to dangle me off naked unless i gave him my nc password.
this whirlwind adventure wasnt as fun as the last two however, so please give me my characters back.
Heavyporker
21-09-04, 19:26
Hm. Tricky. Gimme a bit, I'll be back.
"last night an evil spirit possessed my body, i think it may have been one of satans minions, anyway i went on a rampage, posted tonnes of midget lesbian porn, and called everyone naughty names, and i think i mave have accused one of the moderators of being too fond of donkeys... since yesterday i was taken to a nice catholic priest and the demons have been excorsized. please remove my ban, as it was not my fault, it was the dark lord's. thank you for yourtime!"
wow I sure hope all forum mods are not making the same generalizations about there customers post's, I somehow disbelive this quote was ever read by this mod or any other mod. it almost seems as if they are blowing it out of proportion just to justify banning of accounts they found questionable.
I myself am hoping not to be banned for responding to this post I find this pretty insulting that a mod would come in and make up a paragraph about a Customer or even an ex customer that was paying for the further devolpment of the game. Maybe a reminder of the EULA should be made but not this seems hardly appropriot.
LiquidMetal
21-09-04, 19:31
Well i think my excuse would be....
"Ive been teaching my dog to perform simple tasks on my PC, and would you believe, while i was at the store, my dog booted up my PC, and spent the next 2 hours logged in on my char, when i got back all my stuff had been sold, and no one would talk to me...apparently my dog spammed trade with "WTB A HOT BITCH" non stop for an hour and got my account banned when a GM visted and he called the GM a "Lame ass whore" who "didnt know anything about dogs or Neocron" and "should go insert stuff where the sun dont shine". He also seems to have logged into the forums and flamed and trolled everyone he could. (he has also maxed my credit card on "animal porn" :(
Please could you return all the stuff i lost due to my dog selling it, and unban my ingame and forum accounts as i obviously would NEVER do such an awful act (even after a days drinking)
PS My dog got severely reprimanded, :)
I could prolly think of better ones, but i just finished work ;)
Shadowbreed
21-09-04, 19:34
A lil twist to my dog ate my homework:
"My dog ate my keyboard and mouse and it shortcircuitted (sp?) in it's stomach and put all the bad things i said on the screen, and before i could turn of my compie the mouse clicked the damn submit button"
wow I sure hope all forum mods are not making the same generalizations about there customers post's, I somehow disbelive this quote was ever read by this mod or any other mod. it almost seems as if they are blowing it out of proportion just to justify banning of accounts they found questionable.
I myself am hoping not to be banned for responding to this post I find this pretty insulting that a mod would come in and make up a paragraph about a Customer or even an ex customer that was paying for the further devolpment of the game. Maybe a reminder of the EULA should be made but not this seems hardly appropriot.
Did you actually read my post? This was something I made up for a laugh.
o ya me too! that would be my excuse.
I would blame liquidmetal and say it was him and his evil dog plotting and scheming against me
'I was drunk' is always my excuse. Because it's true. Someday I will be permabanned at that will be the reason.
mine would be "my account got hacked!" as an excuse but actually coz I know me, I'd say "damn straight it was me you donkey f****r" :D
wow I sure hope all forum mods are not making the same generalizations about there customers post's, I somehow disbelive this quote was ever read by this mod or any other mod. it almost seems as if they are blowing it out of proportion just to justify banning of accounts they found questionable.
I myself am hoping not to be banned for responding to this post I find this pretty insulting that a mod would come in and make up a paragraph about a Customer or even an ex customer that was paying for the further devolpment of the game. Maybe a reminder of the EULA should be made but not this seems hardly appropriot.
[edit] ok that was a troll :P srry
but man seriously read a thread before posting in it would be a good idea from now on
my mom just shut off my computer, resulting in my char getting deleted, and losing all my stuff, can I have every rare artifact back, since they were wrongly removed from my body...
ShadowStriker
21-09-04, 20:44
um
"it wasn't me it was the 1 armed man?"
http://www.itwasmybrother.com
The old ones are the best ones. ;)
Spikadelia
21-09-04, 20:47
I am clinically diagnosed as a schizophrenic. I have three accounts one for each of my personalities, unfortunately I ran short of medication over the Bank Holiday and when I came to on Tuesday my parents were neatly shrink-wrapped in the freezer, the dog was blowing smoke rings in bed next to me and my accounts were all banned. I blame the Linda within.... she was always bad. 8| 8| :eek:
"When I went to bed, I let the computer to be online since I had like 43 pr0n movies to download.. anyway, when I wake up I see this huge wallpaper with a man's ass and a text above "you've been pwned". I think "wtf?", I remove the wallpaper and I didnt think more about that. I launch Neocron and realizes all my characters has been removed. That's when it hit me, I've been trojanized!"
"The Big Boy did it then ran away!"
Doc Holliday
21-09-04, 21:25
"have u ever seen fire in zero gravity?"
that would be mine. ok i might not get unbanned but i sure as shit would confuse the fuck out of u and make you all in the office go wtf feel sorry for me as im slightly unhinged and maybe unban me?
"It couldn't have been me! I was saving the world from destruction by the hands of some intergalactic pool players who wanted to pot us in a black hole at the time. I even have this intergalactic cue stick to prove it!"
All your staff are belong to us - Unban me or they shall face the consequences.
"The Big Boy did it then ran away!"
dude, you ARE the Big Boy, and that sounded so wrong >.< your bigger than me.. umm, thats not right either... your like 7 feet tall! :p
LiquidMetal
21-09-04, 22:13
I would blame liquidmetal and say it was him and his evil dog plotting and scheming against me
rofl, ill train my dog to be a professional witness, ill get away with anything ;)
dude, you ARE the Big Boy, and that sounded so wrong >.< your bigger than me.. umm, thats not right either... your like 7 feet tall! :p
6'3"... Nightbrother is bigger than me though... :(
rofl, ill train my dog to be a professional witness, ill get away with anything ;)
its a good thing i speak dog fluently (i must do to speak to my ex :P) and me and the dog will barter a deal for 3 peices of steak which will put u in the slammer muahahahahahahahahahahaaaa
/end evil genious plan
-=BlackBeard=-
21-09-04, 22:59
Well i think my excuse would be....
"Ive been teaching my dog to perform simple tasks on my PC, and would you believe, while i was at the store, my dog booted up my PC, and spent the next 2 hours logged in on my char, when i got back all my stuff had been sold, and no one would talk to me...apparently my dog spammed trade with "WTB A HOT BITCH" non stop for an hour and got my account banned when a GM visted and he called the GM a "Lame ass whore" who "didnt know anything about dogs or Neocron" and "should go insert stuff where the sun dont shine". He also seems to have logged into the forums and flamed and trolled everyone he could. (he has also maxed my credit card on "animal porn" :(
Please could you return all the stuff i lost due to my dog selling it, and unban my ingame and forum accounts as i obviously would NEVER do such an awful act (even after a days drinking)
PS My dog got severely reprimanded, :)
I could prolly think of better ones, but i just finished work ;)
damn dog u shud get him neuterd
anyway i wud direct them to e great site
www.cowdance.com (http://www.cowdance.com)
how cud they keep me banned
I would insert lots of links to psycology related .edu papers regarding the multiple person syndrome to support my claim that I am in fact a whole lot of people. Blah blah about "identity", "me" and "accountability" and so forth and so on.
Then I (you? hah! you?! :rolleyes: ) would (stfu let him finish! :mad: ) post on the forum how I (there he goes again... me! me! me!) would (kids!) insert lots of links to psycology (duh sucker can't even spell rigt :p ) related .edu papers regarding the multiple (deja vu? kick the cd player eh) person syndrome (must prevent this post) to support my claim that I am in fact a whole lot of people. Blah (he's spoiling the Perfect Unban!! 8| ) blah about (ffs don't allow him to hit - Submit Reply guys! :mad: :mad: ) "identity", "me" and "accountability" and (stop! STOP!! STOPP HIMM!11one :wtf: ) so forth and (must... use... the left arm... to push the mous away! quick!) so on to quasi cleverly (You will NOT click Submit Reply oh no sirree! :mad: OMG! onos!!) state how I could convince KK to unban me cuz it wasnt me. Quad erat demonstrandum.
This whole post should get a "Keep it in game" closed as spam :)
I like to play neocron with the sound up, so that the booms of guns and effects really draw me into the game. Much to the chagrin of my roommate. Apperantly my roommate had had a bad day this day, and one of my 4am playing sessions seem to have set him off. Bargining into my room he proceeded to duct-tape me to my chair, wheel me away from the computer, and do everything to get me banned from "this infernal game" and everything involved with it. It was not me calling the GM all those nasty things (I dont even know what [edited] means) or hurling those insults. and i most certainly did not call everyone associated with this game [edited] or say [super edited] or [omg why are you saying such things] about MJS, Reakktor, or the forum moderators.
Really, it was my roommate, can I please be unbanned now?
"You would never have remembered yesterday's trangressions if my Delorean could go faster than 87 miles per hour. I found the secret of Neocron Exploits, and all I got was this lousy permaban!"
The best excuse ever, that you can use in any situation.
"It was my twin"
Applications :
You get caught in bed with your wifes sister - "It was my twin"
The girl you bonked after the pub lastnight stops you - "It was my twin"
She comes back 9 months later with a baby - "It was my twin"
Your account has been banned for serious breach of conduct - "It was my twin"
That and of course "Yes i used a condom....it must have broken"
Richard Slade
23-09-04, 00:23
I do one out of two every time:
"Nid used my name because he was mad at me!" (Never worked, ever..)
or
"A mod made me! Ziiiiiu!" (Got me teleported to random unpleasant place... Unsure about WHO moved me *coughcough* <3 Ziu.... MOD!)
The best excuse ever, that you can use in any situation.
"It was my twin"
Applications :
You get caught in bed with your wifes sister - "It was my twin"
The girl you bonked after the pub lastnight stops you - "It was my twin"
She comes back 9 months later with a baby - "It was my twin"
Your account has been banned for serious breach of conduct - "It was my twin"
That and of course "Yes i used a condom....it must have broken"
sounds like ur twin has got u into a lot of trouble in the past
sounds like ur twin has got u into a lot of trouble in the past
Yeah my twins a complete asshole ;)
Shadowbreed
23-09-04, 00:41
"You would never have remembered yesterday's trangressions if my Delorean could go faster than 87 miles per hour. I found the secret of Neocron Exploits, and all I got was this lousy permaban!"
LOL!!!
Should've read your almanac to see when you'd get banned and stop it ;)
"Last night my gf managed to find out that i was sleeping with her sister and due to that auto save feature you implemented into the game she was able to gain her revenge by logging in and throwing all my hard earned items out into the streets. She then proceeded to delete my account there. I would be very grateful for a roll back in my characters to allow me to gain this stuff back. For this i shall forward you on many pictures that i have of me having sex with my GF.
As for the banning of my forum account please could you unban this as this was also her fault when she realised that they have those pesky cookies enabled here. I would like to say now that those pictures of the man with the small dick were not me as it was posted and that i would never say anything like 'I shit my pants' and 'i take it up the arse'. Please unban my forum account and remove all those posts stating un-truths about me, for this i will forward videos of my GF and her sister from secret cameras i set up.
I will also for future times remember not to save passwords as who knows what she will do if she finds out i have also been sleeping with her mum and dog too."
O_o
"Last night my gf managed to find out that i was sleeping with her sister and due to that auto save feature you implemented into the game she was able to gain her revenge by logging in and throwing all my hard earned items out into the streets. She then proceeded to delete my account there. I would be very grateful for a roll back in my characters to allow me to gain this stuff back. For this i shall forward you on many pictures that i have of me having sex with my GF.
As for the banning of my forum account please could you unban this as this was also her fault when she realised that they have those pesky cookies enabled here. I would like to say now that those pictures of the man with the small dick were not me as it was posted and that i would never say anything like 'I shit my pants' and 'i take it up the arse'. Please unban my forum account and remove all those posts stating un-truths about me, for this i will forward videos of my GF and her sister from secret cameras i set up.
I will also for future times remember not to save passwords as who knows what she will do if she finds out i have also been sleeping with her mum and dog too."
O_o
hah thats awesome :p
Incase you didnt notice last night was a full moon. I am one of three unfortunate people in the entire world that is inflicted with a terrible disease ( Bullocious shichism) that manifests itself during the full moon. Sysmptoms include erratic behaviour, aggressive mood swings, lack of short term memory, delusions of grandeur and a strange growth of hair on the palms. I'm sure you can see that since I was not myself I was in no way to blame for tossing all my items into PP1 and causing a fight over them. Nor was I to blame for the various names I called the admin team, nor to the sexual situations I accused them of partaking in. Therefore I feel it is only fair that I should get all my items back and have my account unbanned. 100k would be nice too thanks.
Cypher did it, hes the bad one! :p
(That has worked befor)
Cypher did it, hes the bad one! :p
(That has worked before)
lmao
the spam filter : # The message you have entered is too short. Please lengthen your message to at least 5 characters.
Its kos. :rolleyes:
lmao
the spam filter : # The message you have entered is too short. Please lengthen your message to at least 5 characters.
Its kos. :rolleyes:The spam filter has got me on an edit before, when the post I was editing had at least 50 chars. Fuckin' thing.
sanityislost
23-09-04, 03:39
mine would have to be....
Gnomes!!! FECKING GNOMES!!!!! they broke into my house while i was at the pub.
Then the started having a party, drinking all my booze, getting stoned and going
at it in the washing machine......but that wasnt the worst of it.....after the orgy
of booze, drugs and washing machine shagging they hax0red my comp and
rigged it to post flaming posts about everyone and anything that was on the
forums.....sooo can i get the ban lifted??
SiL ..:..
awkward silence
23-09-04, 07:47
The best excuse ever, that you can use in any situation.
"It was my twin"
Applications :
You get caught in bed with your wifes sister - "It was my twin"
The girl you bonked after the pub lastnight stops you - "It was my twin"
She comes back 9 months later with a baby - "It was my twin"
Your account has been banned for serious breach of conduct - "It was my twin"
That and of course "Yes i used a condom....it must have broken"
Your account has been banned! ''Yes i used a condom...it must have been broken''. ROLF
I got a 2 year old daugter cuz of that. =) <-- Not because my acc got banned but...meh you know it.
lmfao this post rocks =P
but i would have to blame.....
PMS..... people have gotten away with murder for this reason why couldnt it help out with the unbanning =)
lmfao this post rocks =P
but i would have to blame.....
PMS..... people have gotten away with murder for this reason why couldnt it help out with the unbanning =)
Gawd - Such a copout :lol:
The universal excuse for everything - It's obscene!!!
Underground
23-09-04, 15:55
What did anima say to get his plut spot rolled back 3 days after he deleted his fully capped tank and made a monk ? Then decided he didnt want the monk and got his tank back with no items ? :rolleyes:
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